Introduction
In the beginning, there was nothing, and God said let there be light, and there was light. And then God created guards, and then they threw you into this crummy prison cell. For what crime? You don't know. The point is, you have to escape.
You scan your surroundings in your new 'home'. There's a guard sleeping outside. There is a window in your cell. The wall looks poorly built.
Freedom! Or not!
You know what is very strong? Iron bars. You know what is not very strong? Your soft, soft, head. It turns out bone does not break iron bars
Down he goes!
Like an ant, he is crushed by your fist. You gently look at his possesions. You see an uniform, a key, and a bottle of whiskey. You pick up the whiskey for later. What do you do now?
Freedom! !
It turns out that walls are not really that sturdy, especially these. You easily knock down these walls. You've escaped!
Unfortunately, your neighbours are making a lot of commotion, and the guards try to pursue the prisoners.
Prisoners don't have freedom of speech
The guard tells you to hush up, he tells you he'll kill you if you wake him up again.
What now?
There is more than one guard in this building.
You stroll casually down the hallway, only to run into a guard. A tough-looking one. It turns out that this prison is well staffed, and has a second guard on duty.
He is clearly not amused. His face is full of scars, and his muscles are bigger than your entire body. It seems foolish to face him. What do you do?
A friendly guard
A minute later, a guard approaches you and casually asks: "What'd you have for breakfast? I was on guard duty"
Bacon and Eggs
We don't serve Bacon here! Hoarding meat, that's a crime! To the dungeons!
Maple Syrup - apparently a luxury
Where did you get Maple Syrup? That's a luxury! An expensive luxury! Wasting our budget like that, that's not right! To the dungeons with you!
What is wrong with you? Urgg. That's cruelty! I should throw you into the dungeons in orderto teach you something about humility! To the dungeons withye!
Pity
Oh, that's depressing. What say we both grab a quick bite to eat in the barracks?
Uh oh
How did you know? Wait a minute! You're the new prisoner! Back to your cell!
What shiny batons!
The guard draws his batons and waves them dangerously close to your face threatening you once again.
Ouch...
He punches you, hard. You wake up back in your cell. Was it all a dream? Owww, judging by that bruise on your neck, no it wasn't.
Thank you for those batons!
You take his baton and beat him senseless.
You punch him and he doubles back groaning in pain. He calls his friends and they move in towards your cell.
Headaches4Life
They punch you. Super hard. You wake up covered in sores, in your cell. This was not a dream!
Genius!
He grunts and goes back to sleep. Suddenly, an idea popped into your head
All those years of fishing finally paid off!
You fish the keys out of his pocket and carefully unlock the cell. What now?
Grateful inmate
You unlock the first cell. The first inmate asks, why are you doing this?
Being the cool dude
You just reply: " I do whatever I wish, and it is in my interest that you are released."
You should run for a position in a democratic society... in a few decades
You deliver a rousing speech on freedom, and liberty. That the those in power has oppressed the weak and the powerless for too long. That man has an inalienable right to liberty, and it was your duty to see to it. "Nice liberty you got there, too bad I'll have to take it" replies a guard. It looks like you took too long. They transfer you to another, better built jail, and you rot in prison for the rest of your days. You die of pneumonia. Moral of the story : Don't give long speeches, or else you will die of pneumonia.END:You're gone, but what of your legacy? What of your relatives?
Anti-empire
You reply that you hated the empire. They've repressed you for all that you could remember, that's why you took up your occupation. Until this happened. "I just want to cause damages to them".
A debt repaid
My past, let's not say. The future is the only thing that matters now. I had a family, they tried to take it away from me, and I ran away. Still, somebody took me in. I've got a debt that can never be repaid, and I'll try to repay it.
"Hilarious", he replies. "Now, what's the real reason?""I'm dead broke."You say."I'll come along with you, I'm broke too."
Freeing the others
You continue to unlock each of the cells in turn. Soon, the inmates begin to follow you. There's an impressive crowd behind you. The guards also bunch up. Some of them try to recall their basic training and stand in formation, but others just look helpless.
"I didn't sign up to be a guard for this to happen" remarks one of them.
One of the crowd comes forward, and asks: "Oi, what do you want us to do?"
Hello
You face the guards. What do you do?
ATTACK
The crowd surges forward, and easily knocks out several of the guards. Soon, you bust out of the prison through a hallway with a hole in it.
That wasn't very nice or diplomatic
The guards punch you.
Smack
You punch the head guard.
On the road to Canonmore
The crowd attempts to comprehend you, but are soon cut down by the slightly more disciplined (1 is better than 0) guards. However, the head guard, for whatever motivation, sees your tactical prowess, assumes that you did it in order to sway yourself in favor of the guards, ie betrayal, and gives you an offer to become a military planner apprentice (they're really short on lackeys for the moment). You accept, as that is the only choice. You set out for Canonmore.
Run!
You easily lose the guards, and escape from a hallway with a hole in it(what kind of lousy prison is this?).
ESCAPED
You have a bunch of blood-thirsty criminals at your disposal. What now?
The Three Doors
It turns out that there are more than two guards in this ramshackle jailhouse. You outrun him, but he's on your trail. Suddenly, you hit three doors. Literally. That hurt a lot. Fortunately, there are three doors. Which door do you pick.
Surprise
He seemed very surprised at this course of action! But then, he starts charging at you at full speed. What now?!?
DING DING DING - KO
You knocked him out. What do you do now?
Hoarding is a prison-wide offence
You took a lot of stuff. The guards approach you, and arrests you for hoarding. Oh well.
Your "friend"
Well then, you coolly wear his uniform until a 'colleague' of his says "Hey, it's break time, I'll take over for yer' no need to thank me." He's obviously drunk and looking for some time alone and to nap. Another guard is also coming along to the guard room. What do you do?
Ah, Delicious
You eat one of his donuts. Ohh, is that chocolate frosting? Whatever the case, the taste of donuts is a refreshing break from this bleak existence.
I think you should've learned a bit more about the guard's background
"You don't have a mother, remember?" says the guard. This isn't funny Gerald. What now?
You should see your face
Okay, you need rest, I'm dragging you to the barracks.
The other guard shrugs, and you're free to wonder outside. There, you approach a long hallway.
Decisions, decisions, decisions
The door leads to a very long hall way. You cross the hallway, and then... This jail really is terrible, they haven't even finished building it! You escape easily. What do you do now?
You examine your surroundings. There is a path leading somewhere... Also a river.
The city of City
You reach of the city of ... City is very much exaggerated. In the deep, dark, forest, you reach an unincorporated but inhabited area! In some circles, it's known as a h__lhole. Not just that, but you found out that you're the governor. You look back at your qualifications. They accept pretty much anybody, actually, at this point. The inhabitants all dislike each other, and wouldn't trust them even in the most direst of consequences.
Do you stay?
Welcome to Canonmore!
You reach the city of Canonmore, governed by your long-time rival in the Academy. But that was a long time ago.
You settle down from your existence. Eventually, you fall in love, get married, and produce children. You spend the rest of your life peddling goods as a merchant in the city, recounting your experiences on the road. Eventually, you pass away on your death bed. In your will, what did you do?
END:You are gone, but what of your legacy? What shall your heir be commanded to do?
Oops, probably shouldn't be here right now.
The left door led directly... to the guard's barracks. Luckily, they're all drunk. How drunk? Drunk enough to accept you as one of their own if you answer one of their questions. The First one asks: Hey George, what's the password?
Private meeting
You always forget, Fred. How very like you. Come on, scram! This is a private meeting. You approach the door, and enter a hallway.
So close and yet so far!
How did you know? I didn't tell anyone yet! You must be a spy! Into the dungeons with ye!
Yes SIR
Uh, Uh, Yes Inspector! Chimes the guards like clock-work. They do their best to do a military salute, rather awkwardly, and march in step out of the room one by one. Now you can scan the room in peace.
You notice a grandfather clock, a table with documents, and a door. What now?
Mysterious tunnel
The Clock has a note taped to the end of the pendulum. The note says : For emergencies only. You push on the clock, but the wall on the back is revealed to be a false wall. You try the key, and it opens to another tunnel. What now?
Tresure?
You go down the tunnel, there, you see a chest with a lock. You cannot unlock it.
Documents and info
The documents don't say much, except something about them lacking a governor in ... It doesn't say, there appears not to be a name to the place. It's inhabited though. They're so desperate for a governor that they'll take the first person with imperial qualifications. Hmmm... You think back to your own qualifications. You come back to the room. While rifling through the documents, you find a key! This will come in handy.
LOCKED!
The right door is locked. Choose another door! Hurry!
Be a hero!
You try to stand up to the guard and stand there, looking all hero-type person like and all. He knocks you out instantly and drags you back to your cell. Oh well. A different guard arrives and starts to nap.
Owned!
He hits the wall, and goes down with a thud!
A hallway appears
Now, you enter a hallway
It's totally legal!
You and several co-conspirators come up with a devious scheme to make some dough. Create a complicated insurance scheme that won't pay out damages and charges high premiums, then lobby the local sheriff to make cart insurance mandatory. It works perfectly, and you and your gang of highway robbers live in luxury for the rest of your lives.
ENDING: Eventually, you produce children, and die, just like in the bible. Before you go, what do you command them to do?
It's a living
Eventually, you arrive at a town. There, a merchant hires you to protect his cargo. You and your merry band become mercenaries.
ENDING: Eventually, you produce children, and die, just like in the bible. Before you go, what do you command them to do?